Feeling left out. :(

Isn't it funny how when people get so close to you, you seem to miss them more? It's like, the more you get used to their presence, the more you miss them once they're gone? It's really mind boggling how a human's psyche really works. I don't even know why I feel this way. I'm actually stuck to her most of the time, but I miss her the moment I get into the car and head home. I guess these are one of those things that you just can't really put your finger on. I've also realized that I've got a lot to prove as an Atenean student. I'm actually pressured to be another success in the family since all my brothers and sisters graduated from Ateneo. Mind you, these siblings I have also passed UP and I didn't. MAN. I hate pressure. It never really had a way of making me work hard. I always just got frazzled into rushing something that never was "A-material". And as much as I want to get high grades I want to enjoy myself too. And I'm not exactly the master at balancing things. I wish I were though. I envy those people who seem to be everywhere and still manage to maintain amazing grades. How can they do that? Sometimes, when I hear about them, I just get caught with my tongue out at the achievements they've done. I just need a minute of that confident swagger these people have, a tiny boost of self-confidence to bolster up my low self-esteem. Then maybe I'll be content. Maybe.